Saturday, June 18, 2022

Halfway through 2022!

In a blink of an eye its already mid June and pretty sure in another blink, the year is over. To be honest, I am actually trying to write daily now, as I felt like I lost my voice for a long time already, and I yearn to get it back. Hopefully by making this a habit, I will eventually found my voice again.

Anway, I haven't mentioned here that I worked in an interior design office for a year now - that was before I quit last March. I had the chance to work on an important government residence, and be able to surround myself with luxurious imported furnitures and fabrics. I was tasked to design all sorts of details, from the rugs, balustrade, main doors to marquetry. Hell yeah, I have no idea what a marquetry was before. But to finally see my design comes to life is cathartic. 

I learnt a lot in that short time I was there, the level of details my boss was overseeing is crazy, which is no question why her clients keep coming back to her without her having to market herself online, and the fact that all of them are high-end residential project. I also love how she maintained such a close relationship with all the other contractors and manufacturers. I have absolute admiration for how generous she is, not just to others but to us her employees too. We were constantly being fed with proper good food (a lot of them are too expensive for me had I have to buy them myself lol) and showered us with all kind of gifts. In another word, she introduced me to an upgraded lifestyle I didn't know I would enjoy haha. She has her own way in dealing a lot of stuff, and she taught us her way.

But working under a demanding boss makes me feel anxious almost all the time, and it makes learning kinda hard to take place for me. Up to a point I really did not look forward to wake up early and work anymore. There were a lot of times I was literally shivering. Tiny mistakes can be turned into such a huge fuss so gradually I became a coward. I wish I had seen myself growing there, but it just didn't happen. It felt like the opposite took place instead. Yes I learnt a lot of other things, but not so much about interior design itself. To be honest I was bad at measurement, my spatial abilities felt like wasn't on par, I couldn't even tell what kind of walls and woods there were so I felt like a total fiasco all the time. Oh and the working hour is crazy too, no work-life balance at all. Came home at 8-11pm is considered normal. Even in that case I was almost always the first one to leave (as I said to live the furthest). That's how committed and workaholic our boss is.

Looking back, my experience were getting dentrimental to me, and I was almost overtaken completely by fear, so I'm glad I am no longer in the company. Although it is my loss for losing opportunities to gain so many highly-influential connections through that office. But I am happy where I am now. Alhamdulillah.

 

   

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