Aminah & Azali

Agak Uztaz Don dah tengok belum video ni? Suka tengok semua video si aminah dan adik dia ni hehe so comel ah tapi yang ni paling terbaek. Sejuk hati tengok anak mat saleh mana berfangirl-ing dengan uztaz don haha. Takde berkepit dengan ipad ke game ape. Walaupun papa dia slamber gaya regge tapi jangan judge a book by its cover, dia ada cara mendidik yang lain daripada parents2  lain. Di mata aku Aminah ni sangat observant (video dalam masjid turkey tu), kreatif (tengok barang yang dia buat and pokok yang dia tanam!), pandai, agak holistik (aku jeles) dan last but not least macam Emma Watson kan hoho. Semoga diorang membesar dan menjadi another mutiara agama. Keep it up, thumbs up Bro Lepat! 

Tak perlu 360 darjah

Yang penting lebih dari 0 darjah hehe.

Assalamualaikum! Today Ive been staying up late again because firstly I bumped into a muslim manga site earlier, it was very inspiring especially because the first comic I clicked took place in my class 5 Rusyd back in Maahad Hamidiah before so yayyyyy (link here) and that linked to my second reason, which is I ended up doing my own poster, sort of.

Sebelum apa-apa, gua bukannya baik mana, tapi tergerak untuk menulis ini. Harap maklum .Of course a lot of us are trying to be a better muslim day by day, everyone wants to reach jannah right, who doesnt? And this matter I believe is not as simple as it sounds. Even sometimes our surroundings do not encourage us to do so, but believe me, its okay to change even just a little. Kecik2 ni orang tak perasan sangat haha. Tak perlu malu segan. Because after all big difference wont happen without these small changes!

Kalau nak guna digalakkan. Guna link ni ye.

                        فَمَن يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ خَيْرًا يَرَهُ  وَ مَن يَعْمَلْ  مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ شَرًّا يَرَهُ                      

   "Barangsiapa mengerjakan kebaikan walau sebesar zarah pun, nescaya dia akan melihat (balasan) nya. Dan barangsiapa yang mengerjakan kejahatan walau sebesar zarah pun, nescaya dia akan melihat (balasan) nya pula.” [Surah Az-Zalzalah ayat 7-8 ] 

Thus, from this verses we know now Allah pun dah bagitau, not to underrate any small deeds and any small sins. Tapi sebenarnya kita manusia lebih terdorong untuk buat benda-benda yang senang berbanding yang susah, yang kecik berbanding yang besar. Sebab tu dosa kecik kita senang nak buat . So soalan ni ditujukan buat anda yang membaca dan terlebih dahulu gua yang menulis. Satu, nak buat perubahan kecik ni susah ke tak? Dua, nak buat ke tak?

.............................(Fill in the blank)....................................


Maka dengan itu,  chaiyooook semua orang!
Selamat berjaya!

Kelantan as in Kelatay Part I

Pertama sekali kalau kau nak tidur jangan lupa tambah kalimah syahadah. Jadikan amalan wajib dapat menyebut asyhadu allahi laa ilaaha illallah sebelum mati baik mati sekejap atau selamanya. Mana tau kau tertidur time tengah bukak blog ni kan wakaka. Tonight I have a sense on posting a school essay on your (little) trip previously. Dalam banyak2 tempat aku pergi, tetibe rasa nak post pasal kelantan, my kampung hahaha. I have drafted this quite ages ago but here it goes anyway. I went to Kelantan last week (by the time I decide to publish this its three weeks already). By bus. I became the lead. And its my first time ever. Without anyone to rely, woha. To be honest I'm thoroughly excited with the whole journey and at the idea of gaining more independent. Sejujurnya gua rasa naik bas lagi bagooosss dari kereta sebab tak memenatkan si ayah dan lagi selesa dengan kushion besar untuk setiap orang. But isnt it is obvious? That I was thrilled. Perjalanan seorang budak lepasan sekolah lah konon. Haha ini semua poyo! 

The sky was always as dark as if its turning night. Musim hujan ayak telebih. My uncle fetched me as soon as I arrived Kota Bharu, where we stay. Just as our first day in Kelantan fall into pitch black, I texted my former mate who have moved here a few months ago. I met her on a very brief KRS program last year, and she told we were classmates in standard three. Honestly I told her that memory was really dim I cant barely remember any part of it. But amazing was how she replied me instantly and asked my whereabouts. Long story short, she brought me to her place the next day. And we spent the next two days with so much fun I've never had before. Its Shah who brought me to Yana places. She came with vast options. Maka dapatlah gua makan angin banyak tempat bersama kekawan baru, bak kata pepatah gendang gendut tali kecapi kenyang perut suka hati.

Ini Yana. I just met her for a few seconds before this photo was taken,  time ni nama dia pun aku tak tau lagi. Obviously budak yang chill dan sempoi

Heres some other photos. Please dont mind my editing. It just that recently I like to play the colours of my photos too much. Sometimes I dont even think its beautiful but I cant stand doing nothing at fresh photos haha. Because I dont have instagram, apatah lagi vscocam. What can I do cuma peeping tom from my sister phone. I envy those people yang senang2 boleh dapat, boleh beli apa yang diorang nak. So, sometimes I'm wondering what my own vsco look like. Well poverty is no barrier. Erm ayat tu ditujukan untuk orang lain kot.

Gua terasa sangat aman. Tak tipu. I guess its because you're so close with mother nature, yet jauh dengan dosa. Yang kalau depan komputer tu, bukak mata sekejap pun senang sangat dapat demerit dari Tuhan. Plus the computer flare yang memang merosakkan mata dan radiasi dari gadget2 elektronik yang memang tak elok untuk kulit manusia. So dengan sini chill saja. Truth to be told gua memang jarang berada kat tempat2 macam ni dan bukan senang nak feeling tau. 

Orang kata kita hirup udara yang sama. Betul, setuju. Tapi hakikatnya nikmat udara tu lain-lain at where we standing. Allah jadikan udara ni sama tapi tak semua orang dapat nikmat udara ni. Kalau Allah nak kasik kita udara tercemar banyak dan tak rasa nikmat ni, tulah yang kita sesak nafas la bagai tu. Kalau Allah nak kasik kita rasa nikmat lebih sikit, haha ni yang semangat ni nak tulis dalam blog bagai, even though its small matter. Just to say how much we appreciate it.

Colour Dye untuk canting batik.  Pengalaman pertama gua di gudang mencanting batik. .

An attempt to break loose from its jail.

Merbok, kesayangan the boy who take care all the animals they kept, and most of the poultry, he is yana's young brother.  In a way aku kudos kat dia.

The beach was completely deserted, but we were there somehow. My aunt kinda prohibited me to go there (It reminds me of the Cullens) so its sort of mischief managed. But Alhamdulillah thanks for everything by far nothing bad had happened. I got to know the range of pulaus ahead (which names I've forgotten now). Predicting what the sea would become in the future. A bear to hug? A monster with deathly weapons? Rumor spread that fish species that ought to be in the middle of the deep sea were found abundant in the shores. An add-on to the current nervous scene. Taking photos until we felt like we had had enough, which I personally found sickening. 

Then we head back, just as three policemen came after us asking apo kono eh jang dok pantai waktu2 cenggini haa. Dengan kamera lagi. Its like being caught red-handed, I totally freak out. But for a second thought, it wasnt a crime for coming to beach during critical times right? Amidst the tsunami warning ahead. They named it sunamo if I'm not mistaken. But whatever the name was, (I didnt watch news) its pretty obvious everyone trying to steer their heads out of the sea. I guess he was patrolling on duty but he said they're having some sort of makan angin. Which I found unconvincing. It doesnt really matter anyhow. What we're doing was, as they had answered, 'for the sake of welcoming me'. Being at the center of hightlight, I felt overwhelmed with gratitude there. It was obvious we were riding motorcycle. Its obviouser mind my lack of grammar awareness  none of us were legally licensed. To be honest they sound friendly. And cool. But they were still a police after all. I was about to feel really guilty before he said some 'jangan main air'. Elok-elok' and left. Simply just like that. No wonder how motorcycles could be just everywhere, even a child carry on them. Not to mention that fact is too true, lego eden haaaa.

Btw boleh tak nama kedai pengantin makcik yang kitorang nak jumpa tu sama dengan nama my first ranking ever pop singer. 

Sampai sini dulu. I tried to keep my story short as possible but you know once Ive started writing, its hard not to tak merepek sangat. Gonna post another photos in part two muahahahah. Assalamualaikum.

Over Limit

Two things that had just ultimately annoyed me to the max. In these past seconds.

• Burnt food that was caused by the kitchen uncontrollable stupidity, not your lack of concerns. It was as if you throw your money directly at the rubbish bin.
• Double extra reloading times in youtube. With the not so good wifi add-on. Spent half ur time for the time-waster ads to load and another looonnng period loading the video itself. Which obviously, has too many R&R stops all over the journey. Pft.

bergerak seperti whip

Whip itu tali cemeti. Kalau dalam debate gua akan jadi whip. But however, I am just trying the gif site. Tadaa.

Jom makan?

Assalamualaikum. Dah makan belum? Kalau belum boleh makan kat sini. Gua post gambar makanan khas untuk kau. As a masterchef wannabe, terlebih dahulu kita kena melebihkan pemakanan.

Semua gambar di bawah adalah hasil nikmat duit mama abah. Dan tentu sekali kurniaan Tuhan. Terima kasih kerana sudi membawa gua jalang jalang makang!

Semua makanan tersebut adalah kesukaan gua. Soal kesedapannya tak usah dipertikai. Mestilah sedap.

Last but not least, sesuatu makanan itu takkan terasa sedapnya tanpa keizinan-Nya. Burp. Forget not to say - Alhamdulillah.

Soal Kematangan

Semalam aku 17. Hari ni naik genap 18. Selamat hari lahir semua kembarku sedunia. Terasa sangat odd. Mungkin kerana aku masih dalam usaha mengenal diri aku sendiri. Proses kematangan. Ahah kau tak suka dengar perkataan 'matang' ni kan. Seumpama aku terlalu rigid tentang peraturan kehidupan sedangkan  hidup kan sudah cukup seronok tanpa garis. Ya. Kita semua tak matang. Tapi satu hari ni kita perlu matang. Tak pun sedikit. Untuk hidup. Untuk survive. Kena tahu skema kehidupan. At least. I know, I read this on someone I truly respect. And it struck me. 

Umur 14 - 25 adalah waktu dimana kita didalam usaha mencari "Identiti diri". Sudah tentu identiti diri adalah sangat penting kerana ia adalah apa yang melambangkan seseorang insan. Ia apa yang menjadikan dia berbeza daripada manusia-manusia lain.  

So the idea there is that how you gonna carry your profile in your future journey is basically based on what would happen in this 11 years. Whats your biggest time consumer now and thats generally how you'll ended up yourself.

Jika di dalam waktu itu kita hanya habiskan masa dengan hiburan, maka didalam kadar peratusan tingginya, begitu jugalah kita nanti apabila sudah meningkat dewasa. Dan jika masa-masa kita dihabiskan dengan menyendiri, maka alamatnya sudah tentu kita menjadi seorang anti-sosial yang sangat sukar untuk digaul.

And so its always better to do something nice in these times my fellow kawan. Nice, you know like making real friends, exploring the world, mengenal Tuhan, travelling, reading things even you doesnt understand enough, painting or just anything. Through you life dictionary. And try to find a meaning behind them so we hardly get frustrated. Nanti dah besar kau tak termampu buat semua ni. Masa kau jadi sikit. Kemampuan kau makin kempis. We dont even know whether the world will still operates on green or not.  Then when its our old ages we wouldnt have to look back and regret on the days we've wasted. Mourning for our ugly sides and wish we had that time again. Instead, we will see oh what a beautiful youth we had.

Dan waktu ini jugalah untuk kita bereksperimen tentang hidup dan membuat sebanyak 'kesilapan' yang boleh supaya kita menjadi lebih matang dan mampu memiliki perspektif yang lebih meluas. Seperti kata Nami, "masa muda inilah kau ada lesen untuk jadi bodoh."

Ahah aku terasa semangat sentimental. What with Imagine Dragons Its Time echoing all over my head. But then it always happen that we stuck in choosing our next destination, as to what path to choose. The left or the right one? So many choices. Tapi yang menjadi juri hanya otak ini yang tak cukup makan garam lansung. Maka apa yang aku pilih kebarangkalian adalah ralat. Nak tahu kenapa. Dari pembacaan, biar aku cerita kenapa. In our body, we dont own only a soul but also a brain. Plus other thousands tiny mechanisms made up of only God knows . Yeah you know that. Everyone knows that. But not everyone knows how it works. Like this.

There's this prefrontal cortex, behind the forehead. Its sort of like the president pf the brain, in charge of calculation and rational thought. It's also the last part of the brain to mature, which is why teenagers often get into so much trouble.

And there's this amygdala. A tiny spot which is centrally located. Since a teenager's decision-making center isn't completely turned on yet, so they rely on this little piece of the brain instead. This is the impulsive epicenter of the brain - the one that houses feelings like fear and anger and gut instinct. Or, in other words - the part of brain that corresponds to "because my friends thought it was a good idea, too"

Bagi aku inilah prosesnya. Belajar seperti jauhari untuk mengenal manikam. Soal apa itu kematangan kita lihat bagaimana aku dan kau ketika tua nanti. Itulah matang yang telah kau semai dengan cara kau, aku dengan cara aku.  

Buat masa ini, untuk menjawab masalah multiple personality disorder ini, aku rasa aku masih dikawal amygdala itu haha. Maybe my rational, planned, premeditated thought is still in the development stage. Beginilah aku. Left in between two junctions. And so there I am. Tercegat. Even for the small little thingy like whether to use English or Malay? To talk for first or keep shut to strangers?  Or either to call yourself as aku gua I ana saya hamba beta or what, patik? Or if you have a friend, and she is about to commit sins, the kind you didnt do and will never do, and you know it. You couldnt stop her. You freak out. Would you escape? Run away from her and the sin? or would you accompany her and get involve with its everthingness - the consequences?  Or for some state you couldnt even describe. Aku terasa keperluan berguru. Persoalannya, if you dont know what to do, then what would you do?

restless

Just sitting around. Went to some places with no money earn but vice versa. Reading and rereading all books I have. It all makes me sick day by day, hearing you works like the rest while I am busy in my own world. I thought I could have done murals in these past weeks but I havent received any response from the other side yet, so it left me hanging like this. Merely looking at the photos of how fun you guys at a day work. I used to do part time job too, back when I was form three , when I got so bored in pmr aftermath. But to see the fact I am jobless in my spm aftermath, is unbelievable. 

Its hard to decide things when actually your decisions are depending on other people. Eventually you stuck between your own desire and other people expectation. Resulting to nowhere. Need a grab man. Its scary to think I gonna have my exam result soon, what with the becoming pru. People are fighting for nonsense accusations and still, judging people on what their brainpower got. and thats mainly the reason why I hate politics, because the people in it. My mates, you know what I'm talking about. Why do we need to interfere with something which we dont know where the truth basis is?

You dont have the right to judge me, or just to anyone else. Well then I hope I'll strike in my spm and live happily ever after. God had plan the best for me, and so for you but still. I hate to think what gonna happen.  All the process of being there, to retrieve our result I mean, was too challenging. I have to admit my fifth and final year at that school was my most painful and tough year. I dont really have any best friend to talk to, cause I know I'd hurt them as much as I hurt myself anyway. It wasnt  like I was lonely, in fact I feel blessed with so many friends I magically got in 2012. Doing it alone was better, and safer, I thought. People expect high on me. It was tiring. Thats why I dont bother to give them the pleasure. I dont care to even be an anonymous cause I like to contribute to the world with my things in a quite life. You may hate me. How many enemies I got was somehow a miracle too. Ha. ha. It was exhausting to live up to meet people expectation. You dont expect anything, dont judge. I really, am nothing. Ordinary as it is. But all along the days and months, even though I wasnt a good muslim but Allah was and is still there. The best listener in the universe. And up until now, when my times is filled with leisure, the feeling hasnt gone. Why in the world I am writing this really? Just for just I guess. As if my restlessness would evaporate. Being a jobless vagavonder, I cant help feeling all these uneasy, nervous and restless. Im scared. In Allah we trust. Lets hope these efforts will be paid with victory. Amin. Amin. Amin.

*By the way for you who wanna explore various ways to kill the time heres the notpron. The hardest riddle available on the internet. Play it, be humble with your computer and get amused.

Sudah Berkahwin

Lately I really like to look at wedding photos especially the pros punya. Even been able to attend some wedding event had already made me happy, I guess. So I can take a shot or two, or none at all but to look at their content faces.

Jiran gua.

The food was aplenty, and the best. Imagine the hand isnt there ok

Kawan abah punya anak. Comel. Tapi bukan ini

Ini. Kerana malu untuk ke hadapan maka apa yang adalah gambarnya. 

Maafkan gua kerana tajuk agak kontroversional.